If you visited a strange church during the holidays were you made to feel welcome?  Almost every church prides itself on the warmth of its welcome, but standards vary enormously. In some churches you are greeted at the door with a smile, spoken to by members of the congregation, helped unobtrusively with orders of service if you seem to be at sea, told about coffee and, if you have children, they are made to feel welcome, too. If you are new to church it makes a positive impact and can make a favourable impression and helps even if the service or choice of music is unfamiliar. Our family turned up at a family special in the West Country and were so impressed by the care and attention the local church had given to welcoming visitors. Several made a point of talking to us, spoke to our children, laid on refreshments and showed similar consideration to other visitors. 

 At others it’s like being a gatecrasher at an exclusive social club, or even an illegal immigrant. You are ignored unless you have occupied someone’s favourite seat, patronised if you can’t find your way around the service, and glared at if your child or your aged aunt makes an inappropriate noise. After such an experience you make a mental note never to come again. On another holiday, we went to the village church where I was filling in for a friend over the holiday season. A party of seven of us turned up for the morning service. We formed over twenty per cent of the congregation. The churchwarden dutifully thanked me for taking the service which I took as conscientiously as I could, but no one so much as acknowledged the presence of the others. No wonder my friend moved from that parish soon afterwards!

Welcome makes or mars a church. Get it right and you are on to a winner, muff it and you’ll never live it down. And even if we think we are doing it well there’s always room for improvement. Whilst welcoming is the obvious responsibility of the clergy or ministers, the churchwardens or sides persons on duty we all have a part to play. Sometimes the 'official welcomers' are unavailable, or there are several visitors. Perhaps you happen to sit next to someone you don’t know. Don’t ignore them, it’s a wonder what a smile can do.

There are a few obvious ground rules for welcoming. Don’t smother people, observe their space, and be sensitive to their body language. Be aware that new people come to church for a variety of reasons: to hear banns read, to have children welcomed, out of curiosity, as visitors from other churches, or to spy out the land! Perhaps they’ve come in distress, at the invitation of a friend, or to make friends. Especially notice children or those who slip in alone. Invite them to join you for coffee after the service and introduce them to established members of the congregation. If they want information supply it to them or ask someone who can help. Don’t however push them into commitments they are not yet ready for. Most of us when shopping resent pushy sales assistants; newcomers to church are probably equally suspicious of keen Christians! We are busy preparing a number of leaflets to be available for different occasions. We have just issued one, which is very parent friendly for those who bring small children. More I hope will follow.

Our ministry of welcome, however, does not end with services. Clear and inviting notice boards, opening the church buildings regularly during the week, using the church as an educational resource for schools, encouraging it to be used for events and concerts is also part of our message to the community. You may be able to think of other ways we can improve the hospitality of welcome to our visitors and the parish, if you can please share your ideas with us. We have a great resource in our building and we need to use it well for Christ’s sake, but a warm and welcoming church family is an even better advertisement for the gospel.             

Don Dowling

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